Friday, January 27, 2012

Moments that define us

For those of us who don't really KNOW who they are, it usually takes a defining moment to learn something about yourself that you never knew before.  For example, I never thought I would want to have kids, until my son was born.  In that moment I knew deep down inside that I wanted the little guy in my life.  Or two years ago when I was laid off, times got really tough but I learned that I was more then just a single skilled person, and that even in the toughest times I could overcome the adversity of the present situation.

I'm sure a lot of people will disagree and say they know exactly who they are, but I'm one with the belief that you really don't learn something about yourself until you have to apply that part of you.  Its like the guy that runs into a burning building to save a complete stranger.  I'm sure he never thought until that moment that he would ever put himself at risk for someone he didn't know.  It could be as simple as a person helping the less fortunate.  But in each small or great moment of our lives, we break the mold of the person that is hiding inside.  Its those defining moments, the moment when you either achieve or you fail, its the moments that deep down inside we all live for.

A picture is usually worth a thousand words, a few years ago the Pittsburgh penguins and the Detroit red wings played in the Stanley cup finals, and with precious few seconds left on the clock, and the red wings up by one, the puck slide through the crease but missed the goal.  If it goes in, it ties the game and the pens still have a chance.  The picture I remember is Sidney Crosby looking on from the bench, watching as the Red Wings celebrate there championship.  That right there was a defining moment, because the next season, Sidney and the penguins won it all beating the very same red wings in 7 games.

Of course there is the other side where some just never see that moment and never learn from it.  You cant teach someone these things, its a life lesson basically and they have to be able to see it before they can learn from it.  The problem with these moments is they can be devastating as well as invigorating.  When athletes play there hearts out and leave everything on the field, ice, lanes, whatever, just to come up short is a crushing feeling, its something you should never forget.  You should never forget the feeling that you came so close to something but you came up short, and you never know when or if you will get another shot. 

See the problem with some athletes is that the memory will always be in the back of there mind, and they develop a fear of failure, once you establish that fear of failure, your destined to fall short over and over again.  As individuals you should never fear failure, no one is going to succeed at everything in life, that's what makes it fun, its supposed to be fun doing something that few can say they have done, that's why we compete, that's why write, that's why we learn, that's what we should wake up everyday doing.  Having enough confidence in ourselves to know that we can achieve the unachievable. Anyone who says it cant be done has already succumbed to the fear of failure. I'm not saying we should embrace failure, I hate losing just like anyone else, but if you are afraid to lose, then you will be destined to lose.

Athletes are a different breed, competition is there life, no matter what event your competing in, its what drives us.  In my life I have won only one championship.  all my other teams falling short, some getting alot closer then others, some just being a disaster, but I keep competing and the reason I compete is because I know if I quit now, ill never know how good I could have been or would have been.  Sitting on the sidelines isn't the place for me. sure one day I'll reach the later years in my life where the sideline will look like a much more comfortable spot, and then when that time comes and if I feel I've done all I wanted to do, then maybe.

Until the time where I "hang it up", there are still plenty of moments left to teach me the lessons I need to learn.  The most recent, sometimes you need to learn to lose with dignity before you can succeed with integrity, and to never let that fear overcome you. don't let the fear of knowing you may never get there again take a seat in the back of your mind. next week is a new week, tomorrow is a new day and just another stop on your journey to glory.  and its that moment, that moment and how you respond that will truly define who you are.

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